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Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Our House is Under Siege by a Lactating Terrorist!

I got up at exactly 6:00 this morning and went about my usual morning routine… brushed my teeth, took a bath, and got on the computer to check my email and stuff. My wife was still in bed, which is already late for her, but I didn’t bother to wake her up since she had a rough day yesterday. She got up sort of panicking at around 6:30 and asked me to buy pandesal for our breakfast.

As I was going down the stairs, I noticed some things were amiss… I saw a tub (a small one) of Star margarine lying near the foot of the stairs.

As the top of the fridge came into view as I went further down, I noticed some things were scattered on it (I could not identify what they were at the time, but I was sure they weren’t there the previous night).

Going even further down, I saw the coffee jar, the box of Lipton milk tea, and a few other things (which were supposed to be on the shelf) scattered all over the sink.

I turned my head to the left and saw the clothes hangers in disarray…

I cautiously proceeded down the stairs and headed for the kitchen where I saw the same scene… stuff were scattered all over… and footprints! I saw footprints!

At that point I began suspecting that it had something to do with the pack of spaghetti I retrieved from under the refrigerator last Sunday night.

That night, my wife, who is terrified by rodents of any type and size (including hamsters), asked me to retrieve the pack of spaghetti from under the fridge. She also asked me to remove the fly trap that had been flipped over under the old stereo rack beside the fridge.

We came to a conclusion that we had a rat inside the house judging from what has happened to the fly trap. Mice can’t do that.

As I slowly pulled out the pack of spaghetti (the exposed part of which was still in pretty good shape), I was surprised to see that half of the contents were already gone and about a third of the packaging had already been gnawed off.

So, I picked the mess up, and together with the fly trap (which has left a disgusting mark on our floor) I threw them into the trash bin.

I decided to set up the bigger trap, and since we had spaghetti that night (quite coincidentally), I used some of the cooked spaghetti noodles that we had left over as bait.

After that, we started hearing squeaks from the old stereo rack…

Then it occurred to me. The monster is residing there! And from the squeaks, I’m thinking that it’s nursing a brood there!

The next morning, Monday, I went in to check the trap. Half of the bait was already gone and the trap didn’t set off! Dang!

Since I had to go to the office, I left the trap in the state it was in, thinking that I’ll just set it up again when I get home after work. And since there was still some bait left in it, I was hoping that I might still be able to have some luck with it.

Nothing changed when I got home last night. The trap was still very much the way I left it earlier.

So, I set it up again… this time with a leftover pizzito we had in the fridge.

This morning, after examining the chaos, I went to inspect the trap… the pizzito was still there, the trap however is slightly off (from where I originally placed it).

She knows!

And she’s very angry, angry that I took a convenient food source (the pack of spaghetti) away from her.

Now, we are under siege by an angry vengeful lactating terrorist!


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